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Dating Rejection for Your Protection

July 10, 20242 min read

Rejection Is for Your Protection

The first date was great: great conversation, a little flirty attraction, and an all-around fun night.  You walk in the front door excited about the second date. You call your best friend to do a recap of the night and go to bed wondering if maybe, just maybe, he is the one.

Day 1: no call, no text, no communication. You start to wonder if you had as good a time as you thought. 

Day 2: no call, no text, no communication. You start playing back in your head the entire date and all your conversations, wondering if you missed something. 

Day 3: no call, no text, no communication. You start wondering if you are ever going to find the one.

The “great date and no call the next day” experience is not to be feared. This is the perfect time to evaluate what you are looking for. Too many times women want the guy to be the one, so they compromise what is important or don’t notice the red flags from the beginning. They just want to stop the “looking for the one” process and often don’t see clearly what is really in front of them.

If he doesn’t call, think of this as your protection. It’s time to check in – on you and what you really wanted. He is not the one. There is nothing you said or did that would change this. 

Too often, women start to think something is wrong with them.  They start to doubt themselves and wonder if they should have said less, talked more, or worn something different. Then they fall into the trap of making excuses for him or defending him. They also fall into the fear that no one else will be interested in them, so they pass off this one guy’s behavior and accept it instead of sticking to what they said they wanted.

The truth is, if he was the one, you wouldn’t be feeling like this. It would be easier. You would be communicating with him and either on the second date already or planning it.

Maybe he had some of the qualities you were looking for, so now you know you are getting closer. Think about what you want, what you truly want. Write down all the qualities that are your Must Have Qualities, your Would Likes, your Dream Traits (refer to the Dear God/Universe letter in Boys Before Business: The Single Girl’s Guide to Having It All).

The best thing to do is focus on your mindset. 

Know you deserve the right person and believe the right person is out there for you. 

Keep your vision close and protect it. 

Be active. Do the things you love to do. 

The most important thing to remember is even if you feel rejected, know that, instead, you were just being protected.

“It’s your time to have it all!”

Jen and Kim

 

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Jen and Kim

Your Girlfriends Not Gurus

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